oh beezy

miscellaneous cultural commentary from two urban twenty-somethings. on this here interweb, we go by "bee" and "zy."

sex positivity

I was perusing Salon.com’s movie section today, and noticed a description of a movie entitled “Sex Positive.”

I haven’t see the film, and I’m sure it’s “important” and “fascinating” like reviewers say, but I’m kinda sad that the title, “Sex Positive,” got used for a documentary describing one man’s life–as opposed to a film exploring the concept of sex positivity, more generally. I mean, the title is relevant, for sure, seeing as the focus is on Robert Berkowitz, a “a onetime S/M hustler turned safe-sex evangelist.” But the idea of sex positivity encompasses much more than advocacy for safe sex practices.

For myself and feminist, twenty-something peers with whom I’ve discussed the topic, sex positivity is a vast and nuanced thing that informs our valuation of our bodies and our pleasure, as well as our politics. It is a paradigm within which we can situate both use of and critical engagement with porn, and it’s a foundation for advocacy for sex education that doesn’t delude itself with the detrimental fantasy that kids aren’t already sexually active or aware. Sex positivity gives us stores like Babeland, policies like over-the-counter access to emergency contraception, and honest articles like this one by Tracy Clark-Flory.

Anyways, I’ll probably see the movie and love it, but I’m hoping some filmmaker is adding “Make movie on contemporary sex positivity” to the to-do list.

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Notes on “The 16 Most Overrated Sexual Acts”

I’m referring to Beth Mann’s recent Open Salon post here.

1. Sex on the Beach
Agreed, and really, sex while exposed to the elements can be rather distracting, generally speaking.

2. Sex in Watery Places
In particular re: the shower, yeah–if I’m not directly under the hot water, I’m getting distracted by being cold, but if I’m under the water too long, I’m getting prune-y. Also, it takes a rarely found harmony of heights, strength, and position-preferences to make this location truly conducive.

3. Porn Style Sex
The quotes under this item seem to presume that all porn sex is rough, and it’s not. I rather enjoy porn-inspired sex when the inspiration’s creative and otherwise good.
p.s. here’s a recommended free source of said inspiration, if you don’t already know about it: www.shufuni.com

13. Tantric Sex
I haven’t tried this yet, but am told by a very close friend that it’s actually quite nice. So, I’m not going to dismiss it as overrated without having partaken. My friend will, in fact, be holding a workshop to share the love. RSVP via comment.

14. Sex with a Large Member
Hmm. Eh. Ok, suffice it to employ a quote from a wise friend–when the sex is like “throwing a hot dog down a hallway,” it’s probably not cutting it.

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